And while we're on the subject of keeping time
/Check out our new timepiece. This thing was built sometime around 1790 within about 50 miles of where we live today. And it's still ticking away like a champ. Getting one of these has always been on my list of things to do, but it weighs about a ton, so I'm afraid it's never going to move again, and we're terrified of winding it, for fear of somehow destroying the giant clockwork goodness that we just invested so much in. But the chimes make us happy. We run out of whatever room we're in and watch the clock make "ding...ding...ding..." noises every hour. And then we salivate, because we're Pavlovian like that.
See that look on the Critter's face? That's the look she gave when she realized that we decided an ancient, quasi-accurate clock was a more gratifying investment than a diploma from a private univeristy. That's her "Goodbye Princeton. Hello Junior College" look.
Read MoreMagnificently horrifying
/Whip it bad. Whip it very, very bad.
Brought to you by... wait for it... Walt Disney Records
I must delete my brain now. It hurts too much.
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